You may have heard about recent anti-immigration march that took place during Independence Day March in the capital of Poland, and my hometown. There were many people participating just as people loving their country and proud of its history, but there were few thousands chanting “Death to enemies of the homeland,” and “Catholic Poland, not secular.”
My husband and I are both immigrants. It’s my 5th year, Sing on the other hand spent more than half of his life moving from Australia, to the US and now to Europe.
I’m all in for freedom of movement for valuable members of the society (as bad as it sounds, welfare immigration is not really that uncommon and sometimes I get mad seeing lazy people sucking off my really high tax), that are confirmed to have no ties to any radical groups and respect local culture.
I won’t watch GAA finals, nor I still don’t know most of the famous Irish people, but I don’t force my belief and my culture on my colleagues.
But I also understand why people can be scared. I won’t lie – I am scared to travel around major European cities as there have been so many attacks just within last year or so.
I’m also upset seeing young healthy men with iPhones newer than mine seeking for shelter, when they left behind women and children, and threw away any IDs. This is not a right way to take.
I guess a lot of people in my country feel the same, or even worse.
Same for Sing – Hong Kong isn’t really a place where Middle Eastern immigrants choose to move, yet the racism is still kinda there.
How does all of that impact interracial marriages in Poland and Hong Kong?
I guess a lot depends who is marrying who. Usually men get less comments than females marrying outside their race. Maybe people think women are more vulnerable or won’t talk back. I read stories of women in age of my mom, that got spit into their faces for marrying a black men. Their kids were called ugly names.
Even father of one of the girls I know said ‘At least he’s not black’ when she introduced her non-white boyfriend.
It was supposed to be a joke, but I don’t think anyone laughed.
I can still see many comments like that under articles about mixed marriages. Look at the gossip sites mentioning the Kardashians – they will have at least few comments saying ‘All of them like black di**s’.
It gets even worse when it comes to marrying a Muslim or someone from Middle Eastern country. “Goat-rapists” are the NICEST things you can read. I cannot imagine what those women go through. I know the statistics – I know the divorce rate, but why bring a person down who just starts their relationship? What will you gain? Even if they break up, how does this affect you?
The most ironic thing is actually women from Islamic countries are the 2nd most popular ‘foreign’ bride when it comes to interracial relationship of Polish men.
I have to say being married to East Asian is actually ‘the easiest’ from all the XMWF marriages in Poland.
Someone I know once said ‘Asians at least bring profits to the country and they stay away from trouble’ so I guess this is why Sing and I hardly ever get any bad comments. And they are always online – never in the face, at least I can’t recall anything.
But I’m still bit scared when we go back to see my parents. I nearly got a heart attack when we took a bus and a guy with ‘No-ISIS!!’ beanie went inside. Don’t get me wrong, F*CK those MOFOS, but I wasn’t sure if the guy is only against terrorist or he might dislike something in Sing and then beat him up.
Luckily, nothing bad happened, but with more fear inside Polish society, I’m not sure how long this peace for us will last.
On the other hand, I have to admit Poland gets more opened – people still look at mixed couples, but it’s not as uncommon as before. Every year the number of interracial marriages registered in Poland increases, and most of them are between Polish women and foreign men.
I guess that’s a good sign and I truly hope one day we can find balance between keeping our country safe, but also opened for others.
Hong Kong – many thanks to Sing for his part!
You have to admit racism is a painful topic when you are in a foreign country. In our situation, racial difference is always a hot topic for people to pick on us. Sadly there is nothing much we can do, but this time I want to share with you the bad experience we had as an AMWF couple in different countries.
Generally speaking from our experience, racism in Hong Kong, Taiwan and China isn’t abusive, we see it as stereotyping instead of actual abusive behavior against interracial couples. A lot of people would think Hong Kong is very open for interracial relationships. I partially agree with that because AMWF in Hong Kong is consider good but not the other way around.
However, the feeling of being discriminated I had usually happens under unusual circumstances. Airplane was one of the places I felt being mistreated. I noticed for some reasons regardless of where I sit, I usually get served last. I made many observations of flight attendants to see if they like to serve from windows to aisle or the other way around, 8 out of 10 flights I was served last in the row and I remember one time I didn’t even get the choice of food! I also noticed flight attendants tend to serve white passengers before Asian. You might think I am very self-centered to say that before I just want to point out that Paulina usually gets served first. Also in restaurant Paulina also usually get a fork instead of chopsticks, isn’t a type of stereotype? She had to make special requests for chopsticks instead.
However, I know WMAF in Hong Kong is usually don’t give people good impression, in my opinion there have been many incidents that white male in Taiwan, China or Thailand showing off their “achievements” of getting laid with different girls, thus hurting the ‘genuine’ girls in love with non-Asians.
Without sound controversial, from my observations I noticed Hong Kong parents will classify children’s partners in the below levels.
- Tier 1: Hong Kong/ Macau/Taiwan/ ABC/ Japan/ Korea
- Tier 2: White from western countries
- Tier 3: white from non-western countries / mainland China
- Last tier: Middle East, Black and SE Asian.
Indeed, having different opinions towards AMWF or WMAF or AMBF or WMAF itself is already a type of racism, as long as can handle and respect each other’s culture difference, why put a tag on them?
It’s all about who you are, not what skin you have.
Comparing to Poland, it’s still easier for mixed couple (in my opinion), but it’s far from being ‘Not a racist place’.
What is your experience with racism in your country or relationship? What is your take on interracial marriages?
I’m opened for all brutally honest comments, as long as they are respectful to each other! We would love to know your opinion!