真的是大小的問題?- why is it always about the size?

I’ve been really slacking off when it comes to blogging recently on all of my social medias – it’s really hard to find something inspiring when your life is made of work, reports, school and complaining you ate all the snacks you brought from your recent trip. However, the world is giving me the inspiration to write – sometimes positive, sometimes negative.

I will start with something positive, as this post is going to be a little rant of mine on penises.
Yes, the famous eggplant emojis, peepees, penises.
It feels awkward to write about it, but I guess someone has to address this issue.

In case you missed my latest video, here are some cute shots from Taipei’s Rilakkuma Cafe.
That’s about it for something positive!

One of my dear readers (Cheers, WM!) sent me a link to an article about white Playboy model getting bashed because she finds attractive and dates only Asian guys. She gets called names, even threat messages! If you want to read more, click here.

Let’s face it – it’s not the first time where (insert ethnicity here) girl is entitles only to date guys within her own race, and if she dates (insert other ethnicity here) , she will make some half-brain men very, very upset. It was like that in the past, sadly – it’s still there. 
I don’t want to say ‘We’re all used to it’, because that would mean we sorta accept it, but it’s not something that we never heard before.

But when it comes to dating Asian men, the first and most common insult that comes out of the mouths of racist people (not even men, but people in general) is ‘I bet he has a small penis‘. It is always about the penis. They won’t say things like ‘Mommy boys’, ‘Tentacle loving freaks’, ‘Uncultured’ (as you can see I did not master in racial insults) – it’s always the penis.
The small penis comment sometimes goes along with ‘He must have loads of money, because you obviously don’t date him for what he has in the pants’.

And you know what? They would be God damn right – I would not date someone just because of their penis size. I wouldn’t turn someone down either. Just because you clap when you walk, it doesn’t mean you’re a great lover – same for a smaller size penis.

Same with porn sites, which is like Instagram version for guys – all the unrealistic expectations in one place.
Let’s face it – all of you been visiting such sites. You may even look up movies with Asian actors – I don’t judge!
If you did, you probably noticed they have a lot of low ratings, thumbs down or nasty (not sexy-nasty, just mean) comments just because the male ‘actor’ happens to be Asian. I won’t get into debate about someone’s taste, someone obviously hated the plot (sic!) but I have a feeling all those negative feedback is given purely by the fact that the male part is given to the Asian dude instead of someone with a cannon.

I do realize statistically Asian penises are smaller in size comparing to other races, but why does it have to be used as an insult? You won’t be insulting someone based on their skin color or their gender, something they were born with and have no way to change (unless, of course, you use Austin Power’s Swedish made penis enlargement). Then why would anyone insult somebody because of their penis size?
Isn’t this just another way to body-shame someone? We fight for the right image of female’s body, but we seem to forget that men can be the victims too.

Men tend to state that guy who doesn’t have a big penis is somehow less of a man, which is somehow ironic because if you ask women, what do they want from a guy, there are plenty of things they rank higher than the penis size itself: personality, sense of humor, kindness,  compatibility, and how he treats her.
Of course, they also care about looks but that’s something that can be change in order to seem more attractive to bigger group of females.

To be fair, these comments also come from some women – things like ‘Measuring tape doesn’t lie’ or ‘I feel sorry for him, I wouldn’t want to be with someone like that’.
They don’t know what they could be missing – and I’m not talking about sex life as it can be boring as hell with Roberto Cabrera himself; they miss a chance to be with someone who could possibly be love of their life.
They wouldn’t want to be rejected based on the size of their breasts or their waist, then why they feel it’s OK to do it to someone?

If you ask me, it doesn’t matter to me if a guy would have a log or a shrimp between legs – as long as he has balls. Not literally, but also kinda literally.
What I mean is, the guy should be a man when he needs to, he should be responsible and make me feel like someone who can take care of me when I need him.
Sing is only 172 cm high, but when a drunk guy approached me and started doing obscene gestures during a music festival he nearly beat the crap out of that guy.

I won’t get into topic of my husband’s penis or our bed life, that’s not the point. No matter what I say, no matter how many compliments I say about my husband, there will always be a someone saying ‘That’s the best he can do, for an Asian with a small penis‘.

But I want this to be addressed to the world, maybe at least one person would read it and change their way of thinking.
I don’t expect miracles, there will never be time in human history when everyone will be equal in the eyes of each other. Yet, I still hope to hear less and less stories like the one that was used to write this post.

PS Every penis is a Schrodinger’s penis – it’s both big and small until the pants are down! 😉 

I know this post is bit controversial and open, but I bet every girl who dates/ed an Asian guy heard this at least once.
I would love to know your opinions on this – even anonymously! 

26 thoughts on “真的是大小的問題?- why is it always about the size?

  1. Oh, yeah, I’ve heard this crap before. And gay guys? I’m calling you out. Gay men ARE THE WORST about presumptive Asian dick size.

    As you say, women just don’t care that much. First and foremost, we have to worry about whether a guy might be a rapist or murderer. Once we’ve established that he’s not violent, we have to figure out if he’s an addict, a narcissist, a pathological liar, or a cheating bastard. Once his basic mental health is established, we can worry about chemistry. If we’re lucky, he has a decent job he enjoys.

    If you have chemistry with a mentally healthy guy who has a decent job, treats you well, can dance, is a good kisser, and can cook? You hit the goddamned jackpot.

    Like me. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha at the end you described my husband as well!

      Honestly, by now, don’t people know that women also have different vagina sizes? And that every woman is different when it comes to what she wants? Communication and honesty are the main things necessary in a good relationship – in the bedroom and out.

      Recently, I went back to the States and a guy next to me on my flight found out my husband is Korean and made a comment about it like, “She must like ’em small!” and I was furious and embarrassed. It felt like such an invasion of privacy and like sexual harassment. I wanted to defend myself but I felt as though saying anything would just make him poke more fun at me. It felt awful but I realized that he was just projecting his stupid insecurities onto me. However, I still felt like he got away with rude behavior.


      1. Never stay silent.

        In the future, responses like

        “You would know”

        “you must have been with lots of asian men to come to that conclusion”

        and the good old

        “bigger than yours” would suffice. Men can’t take hits to their pride. If they have insulted your family, return the favour.


      2. Wow, what an asshole on your flight! Makes you want to press the button for the flight attendant and tell them you aren’t comfortable sitting next to a racist who is harassing you with unwanted speculation about your sex life. And then the flight is disrupted, they make you feel like you’re being too sensitive, blah, blah. I hate it when people pull that racist crap and I’m unprepared. Cuz then I feel like you do, that they got away with it. And then I brood.


        1. Well that’s the thing. In any argument, think about how YOU will feel in the future. Then ask how you will prevent that.

          Remember, they are the ones at fault. So why should you take the hurt, the one who feels outraged afterwards whilst he grows in confidence?

          By simply speaking out, insulting his pride, then the end result is that he will leave in a huff, and as a bonus, he will realise that people will actually fight back against asian stereotypes. Most bullies like a walkover, they don’t like those who fight back.


      3. Women don’t have different size vaginas. All women are between 3-4 inches and it expands when aroused. The only difference are the labia shape/color and clitoris size.


    2. I think you left out the part where you need to send him for STD tests after determining you both had chemistry. Young people are either too naïve or think it’s too uncool to check their partner’s sexual health. Some waited until multiple miscarriages only to find out that their partner gave them STDs.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Interesting enough many of the bad comments we/ my wife gets from guys in China are about the size…i really don’t understand this at all. I mean what does its seriously matter? So what if a guy is equipped like a horse, will it make him a more responsible partner/ husband, will he treat someone better than a guy with a smaller penis? It is just ridiculous that so many people are focused on such stupid point


  3. To answer your question, I think they always mention the penis size because that’s the only thing their small brains can come up with. It’s like when racist hooligans in football matches make monkey sounds or throw bananas at black players. They just can’t come up with anything else…


  4. This is how people see the world. If you were talking with a lamp (sorry for such comparison), you probably would bring up topic of brightness; if you were talking with an african man, you probably would raise a question about droughts.
    My point is – when you don’t have a single idea about something, you (your brain) implicitly degrade(s) it to ideas you are aware of. And if penis length is the most widely spread information about Asian people (and I bet it’s even more than tentacle stuff) then it gets obvious why this is the first thing people think about. Especially when they hear relationship and asian in one sentence.
    Anyway – I would consider it extremely intrusive to ask such questions personally, I feel sorry for people who degrade other people to genitalia.


  5. thank you for addressing this sensitive topic. you and your hubby are lucky to have each other, as not everyone has found THE ONE. and that’s how it should be focused on.
    meaning a focus on a comparability in all aspects, to include a mutual attraction and dependancy. what others think is secondary.


  6. Please do not watch or support pornography! Apart from creating unrealistic expectations, these days there are men who pretended to be boyfriends only for illegal filming of sexual intimacies. After they uploaded these videos online, they get paid via bitcoin sites and can’t even be traced by authorities. This is the most recent method to humiliate women.


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