Being in relationship with someone often makes people develop the same habits as the habits of their partners. I noticed that myself, people who know me for years often tell me the way I speak English changed. More Cantonese I try to speak at home, more I choose the incorrect grammatical rules or I choose different vocabulary than I normally would.
Sometimes I try to explain things to our coworkers and in my head whatever I’m saying makes complete sense, but in real life it doesn’t. I know Sing would understand what I mean (and vice versa), but to anyone who is not us – not necessary.
I bet the same thing happens when you read my posts or watch our videos. So to make your life easier (and for lolz, of course!) I decided to make a pocket dictionary of our most used inside-phrases and jokes.
- Fashion show – all people have ‘The Chair’. The chair that is a storage for clothes too clean for the laundry but too dirty to put them back with freshly washed clothes. Instead of The Chair I use the term ‘Fashion show’ as it always looks like Sing displays his newest T-shirt collection. I have to admit I have my own little fashion show running in the middle room, but that’s because it’s waiting for ironing!
- Cyp/Dzyp/Csip – excuse my language and how direct this is, but that’s the ultimate coc* blocking phrase Sing could come up with. Kills the mood instantly, happened already few times – trust me, I know what I’m saying. It’s similar to English ‘muah’ or Polish ‘Cmok’, but for some reason Sing uses it only in the heat of passion. It makes me forget he’s over 30 and it’s not his first encounter with a woman.
- Meower Fu**er – Biscuit’s nickname at 5 AM. As much as I love Biscuit, she can be very annoying. Cats do not understand the concept of time and daylight saving. She’s a little bit like a cock – making noise when the Sun rises. At night she is a very calm and adorable kitty, but once the Sun shows up she will start meowing for food. The only problem is in Ireland during Summer the Sun raises at 5 AM, so in Biscuit’s head it’s feeding time. At the same time I’m not waking up until 7 so in meantime she will think I’m either dead or trying to make her die of hunger. That’s the time when she changes into opera singer and meows her lungs out. I can kick her out of the bed, try to cover my head, but it’s no use – she will step on me and meow until I become fully awake to feed her. That’s why she’s a little Meower Fu**er.
- You are NOT… *said in Maury Povich’s way* – there was a time Sing and I used to watch a lot of Maury’s Show, mostly for the reaction when guys hear they are not the fathers and women who were 8958159013450% sure the guy was the father now say ‘There could be someone else’. I know, not the most valuable entertainment, but a good time killer at lunch at work. Because of this whenever I say ‘I’m not …’ Sing will say in a very dramatic way ‘You are NOT…’.
– Do you want to eat something?
– Later, I’m not hungry yet.
– You are NOT hungry. YET.
- Detective Schnack – and other words starting with S. For some reason Sing has an awful habit to change words starting with ‘S’ to ‘Sch’ – for example: snack – schnack, stink – schtink, save – schave. He knows how to properly pronounce them, it’s just when he’s with me he will do that on purpose to annoy me.
One night I watched one of those Crime And Investigation shows and one of the detectives was named Schnack. Once Sing stopped to laughing his butt off, he started to add ‘Detective’ to any other ‘S’ word.
Detective Schtink, Detecive Schave and the rest of homicide unit will need to hold me if I hear it again.
- Cauliflower – when I think of it, I don’t remember how this one started. That’s a word I use for penis. Imagine how awkward it can be, especially when we are in public.
We recently went for Real Body Exhibition (exhibition of human anatomy displaying real, 14 perfectly preserved human bodies and more than 200 anatomical specimens) and it was a really fascinating and educational experience, but when we discussed things between each other I would pop out with things like ‘So that’s how cauliflower looks inside’ or ‘How do you know most of the donated bodies are men’s? Sing, you can see their cauliflowers!’.
At least it makes it safe to use around others!
Inside jokes are – in my opinion – essential to keep a good relationship. Beauty and money can go away, but you need someone who can make you laugh even in the worst day.
Sing’s jokes are mostly awful, but I smile (while trying to hide my second hand embarrassment) and that is the most important thing. Even the worst argument can be calmed down by the Detective Shnack.
Do you have any words or phrases only you and your significant other understand? Would you mind sharing them with us? Would love to read them!