做大人的感想 – thoughts on being adults

Time flies, unless you’re in my department during quarter end and you have 5 more hours to the end of your shift but image (9)there’s no one needing your help. Other than that, time flies fast. Our moving to Ireland seems like yesterday, but we’re here for over a year.

Just today I realized it’s already April and next month I’m turning 25. I will be like quarter-century old. I just had my high school exams and now I’m already THIS old? No offense to people who are actually really older than me. It just I FEEL OLD.

Maybe that’s the fact of having older husband? Sing will be 30 this year. That means he can show off that his wife is still ‘in her twenties’, but as a matter of fact, I need to include his aging in my life plans. I don’t want our few year old baby to complain to me that daddy is too old to go out and play football with him.
To be honest I think being a guy is much easier than being a girl when it goes to aging, the guys just get ‘mature’, we get ‘old’. I even heard a ‘genius’ theory passed in Momzilla’s side of the family that the guy is a preservative to woman’s youth. Married ergo preserved and don’t need to be worried about ‘expiring’.

Lucky me – preserved by the power of Little Prince. 

This said, let me share with you with some of my personal thoughts about growing up and being an adult:

  1. I can only have 2 out of 3 – money, time, energy. And if by any chancwe I get to have all 3 of the following, the Irish weather screws me up. Finally I earn enough money to comfortably go out, I have two days off and I can sleep until the afternoon… well, screw me – let it rain like in the Bible! image (8)
  2. I won’t go to a doctor, I will just pray not to die. In the US I could at least blame it on the expensive healthcare, but now I have a really great insurance. It doesn’t matter, unless someone literally drags me to the doctor I will just take bunch of pills and hope to wake up after a nap.
  3. I need to remember about the bills. I don’t mind paying them, but REMEMBERING about them is the difficult part. I thank the guy who thought of ‘direct debit’ option. However, not every place agrees to do this for joint account. Thanks again, Preservative, for making my life difficult.
  4. Just because you love someone, doesn’t mean being together is easy. Aside of any ‘relationship status: it’s complicated’, being together means lots of paperwork. It’s not just ‘yeah, we love each other, we want to be together’. It’s even more difficult if the two of you come from different countries. Wherever we decide to move it means tons of papers to get other papers so we can file different papers. Hail the bureaucracy.
  5. Homemade cooked food is wonderful… when cooked by someone else. I like to cook simple and fast to make food. Older I get, more upset I become seeing frying pan. I swear to you, we stopped eating potatoes only because I’m too lazy to peel them. For rice I can just put it to rice cooker and let the machine do all the job.
  6. I’m actually getting old. Like wrinkled and stuff. I’m closer to look like my mom rather than those young ‘Instagram stars’. Bit like in ‘Freaky Friday’. I love this movie. I think I took my youth for granted, didn’t care too much and now I read those skin care books, put crap on my face and hope I won’t look like I just adopted my own husband.
  7. I needed to learn how to manage OUR time. And I don’t talk about those little daily stuff. I need to plan when to sign this paperwork, how late I will be at work. What about holidays – with my parents or your parents? What time? For how long? Where? I want to be back 18 when I could just tell my parents I go away with my friends and there would be no one questioning me ‘Why won’t we spend more time together?. image (7)
  8. My metabolism has always been shitty, but recently it reached a whole new level of shittiness. Never take your ‘good genes’ for granted, it’s an illusion so you get fat and can never ever go down with your weight again.
  9. I cannot remember all the songs I used to love when I was a teen. If I’m lucky, I will find them randomly on YouTube, if not, I will have some melody stuck in my head and it will bug me every day.
  10. Adulthood is about choices. Pay more for a fridge with a water dispenser or the cheaper, but bigger model with no water dispenser? Should I renovate the kitchen or the bathroom? Do I really need that chair? All those questions kill my happiness from our new home.
  11. ID pictures. The guy who made up the rules for those photos was pure evil. I don’t know ANYONE who would have a good ID picture.
  12. I prefer to napping than hanging out. 8PM and I’m ready to sleep. Sometimes I feel my 98 year old great-grandma has more energy than I do. One of our friends told us that we are one old couple.
  13. People will judge you if you prefer to behave in a certain way. I love cute stuff, my age doesn’t matter. I will be 70 and I will still drink out of my Rilakkuma cup. But I have a feeling that often people, especially non-Asian people, will judge me based on my preferences and not my ability. At work one of our bosses didn’t believe in my abilities until I actually managed to do a thing they couldn’t do in over half a year. Cuteness power, biatch!
  14. I cannot get Happy Meal without ‘the look’. Well, if you give me the same size meal in ‘adult version’ I might buy it. Until that, you better pack me more ketchup to those fries. 12803273_479591788897950_193582845272503783_n
  15. There’s plenty of crap to worry about. Money, health, family members that are far away, is my cat’s puke just a ‘fur puke’ or is Biscuit dying… Worry, worry, worry.
  16. Fees. Fees everywhere. Bank fee for taking out my own money, management fee for apartment I already own while no maintenance is done, fee for paying by card at store or restaurant. I didn’t even realize how many bullsh*t charges there are until I grew up and started to managing my own finances.
  17. Some dreams won’t come true… But you could read that in one of my older posts (click here).
  18. Karma doesn’t exist. Call me jealous, but it eats me inside when I see people who don’t deserve it, yet they still get a green light for their whole life.
    Just because you are good it doesn’t mean your life will be good. There was time I cried and asked my husband why I cannot have this or that going well in my life, am image (10)I a bad person? And he told me ‘Sometimes it’s just not meant to be yours’.

It’s not all that bad, in the end I have a husband I love and who loves me. I have bit more independence. I can blame only myself if I screw up. We are getting our first home together. We can have a baby without my dad wanting to shoot Sing’s balls…
But I won’t lie to you, you have no idea how many times I called my mom to let her know she was right and I was wrong!

How do you feel about growing up and being an adult? Share your thoughts! We would love to read them! 🙂

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30 thoughts on “做大人的感想 – thoughts on being adults

  1. I will have the quarter-century in 3 days ! And I feel the same as you, I’m getting old ! I’m not married I wish I could but I know when I’ll be, in a Chinese family, they will ask for the baby sooner as possible and for that I think “I want to be young again !”

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  2. Don’t even remind about getting older. I turned 29 last month…my back aches, my knees are making non-stop popping sounds/ hurt, everything just hurts and doesnt work anymore like it used to be some ten years ago. I won’t even start about having a hangover…that is the reason I drink much much much less than back in the day, in case I get a hangover ever again I think I will just commit suicide.
    Oh yeah, bills, my favorite part, I always forget them until I get a warning and this one I forget again and again though money aint the problem, it is remembering this stuff!!!
    Due to all this aging part I decided to grow a beard, was getting sick of showing my ID when buying lottery tickets or a few beers…

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  3. My birthday is in May too, but I’m on the other end of the age scale.

    I like your #1 and #10. Very wise. Adulthood (and life) are all about choices. And since we can’t have it all, it’s good to enjoy the choices we made.

    My last passport picture was awful. Too bad. We keep our passports for ten years now.

    I can remember all the songs I knew as a teen. It’s the current songs I have a hard time memorizing.

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  4. I understand your feeling . I am 23 now but I don’t feel I have changed a lot since I graduated from high school. When I was in an old high school gathering , all of my old classmates were talking about job salary and partner . but I still studying in an university……….I will graduate this summer and also need to start worrying about the things you mentioned in the above. To be honest , I feel desperate about life after uni because I am afraid I can’t a job after graduation . However , I always think that’s is essential step to me ‘stronger’ Anyway, growing up to be an adult is painful but it will make you stronger

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  5. I used to be made fun of because I always look younger than my age. Now, I LOVE it. I’m 26 but my body is processing like a 20 year old. And I agree with metabolism…I have this theory that the whole “asian aging” process is often true because Asian women take their youthful look for granted…Nice post!

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  6. So it seems you are not enjoying being “old” too much! (I laugh at your “old” being 25, HA!). I am enjoying it quite a bit. I think I look way better now (31.5) than when I was 20. I am also more confident. I never went out too much or drank alcohol so I can’t say “now I cannot go out like before”. The only thing that I don’t enjoy is the “expiration date”. My rational mind tells me I should have a baby as soon as possible but my emotional mind is like “seriously wtf I don’t feel like having a baby”. Haha!

    PS. I look fantastic on my passport picture! I think I got lucky with the photographer that took it haha. But the pictures I took for the residence permit, OMG I look like a terrorist…

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    1. I guess it’s true what they say – real life begins at 30 😀 lucky you with the photo! Sing got once photoshopped so much he looked like kpop star 😀 my mom’s picture is so bad she literally gets controlled at the airport every single time haha

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      1. Well for me the biggest difference in my life so far hasn’t been the age number, but the transition from student to worker. That is a trauma I still have. I want my 3 months of holidays back!

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  7. Even if you don’t want to visit the doctor when you are sick, please go for a medical check up every year. Early detection saves lives. It is not your metabolism acting up. But because you refuse to exercise on a regular basis. Everyone needs to workout to have a healthier and more positive outlook in life. You will even think more creatively when you exercise because exercising supplies oxygen to the brain. Cutting down on carbs speeds up weight loss. I received black belt in Taekwondo since I was 16 so I am deeply interested in nutrition, health and well-being. Also, I was awarded a prestigious scholarship for Phd. Actually, your dreams is achievable if you put your mind into it. My friend saved for 10 years to pay for her college fee. On top of that, she had to support her siblings and parents financially. She got her master degree by the time she turned 30. If you think all of us achieved our dreams easily, please think again. We all worked our asses off. Even the famous Polish nobel laureate, Marie Curie. She was so poor when she was pursuing her degree in Paris that she fainted due to hunger. Although I am not a nobel laureate, I went through so much difficulty to pursue my dreams. Dreams comes with sacrifices. Also, Momzilla is the perfect role model to learn about investments if you can ignore her other shortcomings. No excuse for you to fail. Karma does exist!!! So is the law of attraction. The more one complains, the more shit follows.

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  8. Haha, adulthood is all about life choice and you are so right.

    You know, when I was younger, I used to do lots of long distance running, few half-marathons and some triathlon races, but these days I feel very lazy to exercise after work and my aging knees can hold up too much impact. Having said that I still try to go out for hikes and kayaking on the weekends. It certainly keeps me happy and make me feel alive (without busting up my knees)

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      1. A couple of years ago, I raced a man at his 70s to the top of the Lion Rock at night and he beated me by at least 20 mins. Little did I know he was a triathlete and a kungfu master. On that respect I take that you are complimenting yourself 🙂

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  9. Love your posts because they are so real
    5. Love the reason you now do rice instead of potatoes
    8. I lost my six-pack after 30, is now working on losing weight – I am gonna fight fate
    9. The sailormoon cantonese song got stuck in my head the other day when I an nervous … Dr. Sigmund Freud please?
    10. you just need a jug – water dispenser is for Americans, and they are fat
    11/12 – all true
    13. What did you do that they couldn’t?
    17. I wanna be painter/artist/ scientist/zoologist before…
    18. try judging people by how learnt they are, not what they own – I am much more pompous now
    All in all, you are doing much better than many others, I envy you

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  10. I’m a monkey older than you than next month and I can relate to many things you listed. 25 seems years ago and like yesterday. If you’re worried about your metabolism, take an assessment of your diet. Lots of fresh fruit and veggies to boost it and your energy. Have you thought about a light lamp to help with the sunny Irish days or wearing lighter colours for a boost too?

    I think there comes point (in your 30’s) you kinda realise you’ve just gotta roll with. Look after yourself young, it’s easier to look after yourself you’re older (diet, working out, slathering on creams (I’m with you on that one!), SPF). Same applies to finances, which I didn’t learn early enough. I remember at your age, my age now was ancient (you’re meant to have kids, a house etc). But I still feel young, I get mistaken for being younger. The trick is not to let the age creep in, it’ll take hold. But #12. I can relate. 100%!

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  11. I actually prefer to be an adult, having a job and using my free time on whatever I wanted. (I don’t have children.) I was in university for 5 years for 2 degrees. I was tired of studying full-time.

    So for myself, becoming adult actually was building on learning outside of books and classrooms.
    As for aging physically –well yes, life is not perfect skin wise.

    As for weight…well, have you found an exercise you love to do several times a wk.? That’s quite key. It might take awhile to land on something.

    Enjoy life’s explorations. Learn to reciprocate to other people’s blogs. 😉 by commenting.

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  12. i can’t help but smiling as i’m reading this, because many of these apply to many people, myself included. one thing for certain, i’ve given up complaining about things i can’t or don’t have, and just be grateful with the things i already have and for the little things that make me happy. life is too short to be negative. hope you and sing able to remain positive and just enjoy what you both already have.

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