寵壞的孩子 – spoiling your son

As you might have noticed Momzilla has been my inspiration for past few weeks. image (42)She’s an endless source of  anecdotes, funny situations or frustration. She could have a book written about her, later a movie based on the book and children would play with tiny Momzilla-action figures. She’s a silent contributor to My Hong Kong Husband. Same today – unaware how big impact she has.

In my country we say that no one can spoil you as much as grandparents. Momzilla goes one step further with her life-long motto ‘Don’t raise your son for a husband to another girl, let her deal with it’. That’s how I’m married to a 12 year old trapped in a body of 28 years old man.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband even with all his weird and often childish behavior, but I’m pretty sure Momzilla deep inside denies that his actually a grown up man and still spoils him. Sing is not spoiled, but he is being spoiled. image (40)Quite confusing, isn’t it? She luckily didn’t have much impact on him with all the spoiling she does to him, but it doesn’t mean there was a day she stopped trying.

But what can I know, since I’m not a mother? Maybe one day I will be a crazy Momzilla myself. Because of that, with Momzilla’s experience, we a  made a short guide for girls who might one day be mothers-in-law themselves:  how to raise and keep happy son and make sure he will drive his future wife crazy. Might be useful for guys as well.

  • Don’t teach him any housework. His significant other will be happy to do all the things for him. She should be thankful she can clean dishes that touched Little Treasure’s mouth.
  • If the son learns a bad habit of doing house chores from his friends be sure to show him completely opposite way of doing them. In future, the wife will be so upset with his performance she will do the chores for him.
  • One and only time ask him to buy veggies down the street. Later when he grows up he will use it as an argument ‘I don’t behave like a 10 year old, I had chores!’. a89d6195f8d42f4be949f6c8cd5c8924
  • Your recipes should stay secret. Share them with your daughter in law, but make sure you hide one important ingredient so the food she makes for him will have all the nutrition but will never be as good as yours and you won’t need to worry that your son will break your heart saying ‘It’s even better than my mom’s!’. Profit.
  • Whenever you come to see him, buy him expensive clothes that can only be washed by hands. Lots of them. That will not only prove your love towards your Little Treasure, but will also make him used to higher life standard so he will spend more money on himself. But wait, there’s more! Person who will do the laundry will be your daughter in law, now busy with all the things she has to clean by hands she won’t interfere with your private mother-son time.
  • Overreact whenever there’s a tiny boo boo. Doesn’t matter if he hit a corner with his toe or broke all of his bones. Always overreact, once his alone with his wife he will think she doesn’t care much. Plus it will make him look really annoying in DIL’s eyes. Remember to leave a list of impossible to find Chinese medicines and enjoy your time alone with Little Treasure when DIL is running around the city trying to find it. Then complain about buses’ fares. Double profit.
  • Don’t celebrate anything. Everyday since a birth of Little Treasure is a celebration therefore there’s no need to make any other day more special than the other. Little Treasure Pass that philosophy to Little Treasure and watch disappointed face of his significant other when she hears about it. image (41)
  • Tell him he’s a Little Treasure everyday. Little treasure is the biggest treasure other woman can have so teaching him about the gifts is unnecessary. Future daughter in law should be happy to get anything more than him, since he is already a dream come true and ultimate goal of love life. If your boy disobeys and insist on a gift for his love interest be sure that the gift is to benefit him, not her. Two cooking books in a row should be good enough. Your little prince will be always full and happy.
  • Make him dislike chocolate and other desserts. Let him fall in love with onion and garlic. Besides the variety of the fragrance his future girl won’t be able to enjoy any afternoon tea with him seeing his upset-about-chocolate face.
  • If you made a mistake in your life and your Little Treasure didn’t follow your rules, for example he tries to help at home, run after him and takeover his task. Use force if needed. In the last stadium of ‘Good Husband’ disease you might also need to raise your voice, but sometimes you need to be brutal to the one you love. If he helps in your presence, God knows what he does when you’re not there.

image (39)You might wonder how I manage to stay sane. Don’t worry, Sing helps me a lot, after all the things that happened to me and us I’ve reached Zen or Nirvana or whatever calm state of mind someone can have. I’m like a lotus flower on a calm water. I’m like a train full of meditating monks. I also eat Sing’s part of the desserts so I’ve got that going for me.

Can you think of any other advice for future mothers-in-law? 😉 Have you been spoiled as a child? Or maybe someone you know? Share your stories and opinions! 🙂
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35 thoughts on “寵壞的孩子 – spoiling your son

  1. When I tell my mom to stop freaking out over my younger sister’s life, she will always claim I do not understand and hit back with: 养儿100岁,长忧99 (if you have a child for 100 years, you will worry about him/her for 99 years). I guess that is true as far as Asians go, I have seen my peers getting more paranoid than my mom, the newer generation parents are called cotton wool parents, wrapping their kids in cotton wool.
    My mom is not as bad as Momzilla in terms of chores though, she will make us do some chores for her once in a while 😉 . Only thing is she will keep complaining that I am fat, yet feed me with unlimited delicious food.

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    1. I’ve heard that one. I guess that’s an Asian-mother’s motto haha 🙂 at least she’s freaking out about your sis, which I’m bit surprised because all mothers I know (non-Asian as well) prefer sons over daughter if they have both haha 🙂

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    1. Good it made you laugh 🙂 it’s pretty funny to be around her because I never know should I laugh or cry or maybe cry while laughing… but she’s hilarious in her own weird and creepy way haha 🙂

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  2. I never learn. I took a sip of coffee just as I read “She should be thankful she can clean dishes that touched Little Treasure’s mouth.” and almost spat it all out, it was so funny. 😦 (No worries, no dribbling. Was a close one though 😮 )
    Is this one real??: “his upset-about-chocolate face” I see it working as an advantage as it means more for you, but if it’s so strong that you have to watch an upset face while eating it… XDDD
    Hilarious post as always. Momzilla truly is an inspiration. Stay Zen! 😉

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    1. I try to think there’s more for me but I really cannot enjoy whenever I look at him. He doesn’t even pretend he likes it, I’m in 85C bakery eating my chocolate ball cake and he looks at me with that disgusted face and says ‘That looks like a rat poop’ … Well, I don’t say after a meal his mom cooks he could kill a vampire >.<! But I'm glad you enjoyed :)!

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      1. Aww noooooo! It’s not just he doesn’t like it, he makes poop associations?? Oh… then it’s definitely hard to enjoy. :/ Maybe make a mask for him to wear with a smiley face while you eat? With some duct tape so he doesn’t make any poop suggestions either… (Not extreme at all (hehe), but do what you have to do to enjoy your choccy!)

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  3. Oh my gosh! Does she really do these things?? I thought my mother-in-law was bad, but she’s a saint in comparison. Her biggest trick was crying as soon as we arrived at her house so her son would rush to her side and see what was wrong. Then she’d get upset with him, call me over, and try to play us against each other. She finally stopped a few years ago. Now we get along.

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    1. She’s very specific, very Sing-centered, I wish she was more normal but more I read more I realize it’s just part of being a mother in law haha 🙂 good to know you two are better now, that kind of tricks are really not fair!

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  4. I think this is just part of being a Lai Lai. Even my Chinese friends say for a girl a Chinese mother in law is the worst.
    Everyone who has a non Chinese mother in law seems to be much happier haha!

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    1. glad you enjoyed! I don’t know if you got my e-mail, I had no response but my Internet is not stable recently, I wrote to you I got your package and I feel really touched with the dedication 🙂 thank you so so so so much 🙂 can’t wait to review it!

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  5. Oh, no! I better get to work quickly. Jake is 16 and still doesn’t really do many chores besides taking the out the garbage and recycling and cleaning the cat box. But he’s a great babysitter and is really responsible with younger kids. So maybe that’ll be good dad material? My husband’s mother did all their laundry, which is weird (because that included doing the sheets EVERY SINGLE DAY) considering that my husband does 8 loads of laundry each weekend. So maybe it was learning by observing in his case?

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  6. Thank god my MIL is a bit different. She is more self-centered than on her daughter 🙂

    However, I love the guide of doing the dishwasher. I think I succesfully used that one as a child to lose all priviliges of doing house work…well, now I do everything besides cooking :p

    I can’t even know where to start to comment on MOMZILLA except I think I have the perfect cure for you husband. Send him for a week, no what I am saying, I mean a day to stay in the same apartment with my MIL. He will develope a cleaning OCD, do all thew housework and starts eating tons of chocolate. At least this happened first to FIL and nearly to me 😀

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    1. I’m not sure if he’s prepared, Momzilla made him quite numb to any other signs of being crazy MIL but your MIL is one of a kind haha 😀 plus he might not understand the concept of ‘there’s someone else besides you here’ haha 🙂 but for chocolate it’s worth trying 😀

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  7. Hahaha… sounds soooo familiar. Though my momzilla comes from a different Asian culture. I have a bit to add to the last rule – If he tries to help at home, loudly denounce him as “hen-pecked” and question his “manliness”. That otta set him straight 🙂

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    1. Really? 🙂 I had no idea, I tried to keep it as a joke but it’s a fact my husband is spoiled by her a lot. Guess who is sleeping on 5 pillows because one day he had a back pain… 😀 me and Momzilla are fine though 😀

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  8. this is very true!! Also why my husband insists on dry-cleaning everything. I do all the laundry and he sometimes complains that it’s not done enough. Well, I work, clean, cook (sometimes), so when I feel like doing laundry, it gets done. I tell him “Do it yourself!” and he just walks away hahaha

    I noticed this kind of thinking a lot in Japan! My host brothers totally took advantage of their mom but she just did it all gracefully… And then had a couple beers when they slept.

    At least you get to make a blog and share momzilla’s craziness with others 🙂

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  9. My mum is ALWAYS on my wife’s side. Always! I think it’s pay back time for all the trouble she’s been through with me when bringing me up. And now I’m father of a two month baby girl. In the future I’ll have three generations of girls against me… Sigh… I should send my mum send your post…..

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  10. I enjoyed this post a lot Lina.
    My mother in law is nothing like that, T wasn’t spoiled at all, which makes our marriage very smooth.
    He has always been asked to clean, buy groceries, learn to cook, make his bed…I feel lucky he came with that mindset!

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  11. haha good funny post! Like Survivor Home! haha all strategic tactics used at home! haha

    Honestly kinda worried about how the “strawberry generation” is going to be! I just came back from Kenya and shared with my 5 monsters (nephews and niece) about how fortunate they are… they gave me their short precious attention for less than 5 minutes and then start throwing their expensive toys at each other again! -_-!!!

    Let their wives & husband to teach them next time! haha

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